Sunday, October 25, 2009

It's too hard being perfect so I'm going to start being irrresponsible.


Menu of the Day:
Music: David Gray's "Draw the Line"
In my glass: Millstone French Roast.
Book: finished my second David Ellis courtroom drama book "Line of Vision". Looking for a new book now. Heard that John Irving's new book is out tomorrow.
Last iTunes purchase: Dispatch's "Carry You". BEAUTIFUL song.
What i keep forgetting to do: Make a dental appointment.
Welcome: to EoDE (Empress of Divine Expression), jojo's 23rd follower! And Furline! So glad you finally got your low rent ass over here! Dick Cheney break up with you or something?
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Yesterday Ms. Hippie/Kylee's mom, Marie and i went over to Troy's house to stage it in hopes that he can sell it. (Right now it looks like frat boys live there and i think the realtor is afraid to go there.) We got a lot done, uncluttering and rearranging furniture and throwing away crap, and it looks great! Marie was smart enough to leave before it was time to scrape off wallpaper. I had no idea what a terrible job it was! (And I am so sore today. )
Troy and his son got off work and around 4:00 pm and we started scraping. The three of us to pass the time started talking (before my husband and Kylee/Hippie came down to help too - which took until 10:00 pm). Anyway, I don't know how the subject came up, but i think it started with me saying i was sick of being the First Born Type A person and that got me to come up with all the ways i was going to start being irresponsible from here on out, because irresponsible people get all the attention and people often think that irresponsible people are more fun. So here is what we came up with:
* * * * * * * * * * *
1. I am not going to even go to the dentist anymore ever.
2. I am going to quit flossing my teeth everyday too. (Maybe only on Wednesdays and Sundays.)
3. And maybe not even at all!
4. I am going to start showing up late to everything.
5. And when i have a get-together planned with someone i am going to cancel at the last minute.
6. And not only that, when someone wants to plan something, i am not going to commit right then until i see if i have a better offer with someone else who i think is more interesting.
7. I am going to file my taxes late.
8. I might even cheat on them. (I'll claim Ms. Hippie/Kylee as a dependent!)
9. Hey, i might not even file my taxes at all!
10. When there is a long line of merging to one lane in traffic, i am going to cut in front of ALL the cars and get in the front of the line.
11. When people stop to let me in i will not even wave thank you to them.
12. I will stop saying thank you to people when they do something for me, as if i am entitled.
13. I am going to drink too much everywhere i go and i will pretend to fight with people when they want to take my car keys away from them just to piss them off.
14. I am going to re-gift the presents my mom gets me to other family members. (and i won't even care if they know!)
15. I'm not paying my bills on time anymore either.
16. I am going to park in the handicapped spaces on days it's raining and i don't want to get my hair wet.
17. I might even park in those spots when it is NOT raining.
18. When grocery shopping i will go in the express line with 50 items and beligerently complain if anyone tries to tell me i can't.
19. I am going to call in sick on Fridays when i am not even sick.
20. ...and maybe on the following Monday too!
21. When i got to dinner at somebody's house, I am going to take home my bottle of wine that i brought if it's still half full.
22. I might even show up empty handed when i got to dinner at someone's house!
23. I might even take home other people's bottles of wine!
24. I am going to take more than 5 items in the dressing room.
25. I am going to leave our jack-o-lantern out until Christmas!
OK, y'all know the rules. What are the ways you want to be irreponsible?

31 comments:

jojo cucina cucina said...

I just realized that i have THREE R's in "irresponsible" and because i'm trying out the new me: I AM NOT GOING TO EDIT MY MISPELLING, so there.

jojo cucina cucina said...

I have to admit, that's alittle harder than i thought, but i'm sticking to it.

Next thing you know i'll be able to walk by pictures on the wall that are hanging askew and will I can ignore crooked levelor blinds. Maybe I will even be the one to put the blinds up so they are crooked on the one side.

Modern Hippie said...

haha GREAT post jojo!

music: random lame music that plays in the lobby of the sheraton, sometimes its alright - some rolling stones, clearance clearwater but then there is annoying celine dion christian music : ( its horrible. and loud horrible kelly clarkson songs.

in my can: diet coke. i'm not supposed to drink at the desk so i guess i'm already breaking the rules!

book: howard hughes - still fabulous, give me some time to finish its a 400 page book and i dont have alot of time to read and more often than not my free time is devoted to reading school books so i can learn about the sizes of plywood. (jo will get that reference) haha

last intunes purchase: its been awhile but it was Ben Harpers - Faithfully Remain someone on her turned jojo on to it and then she turned me on to it. its a great song for josh although 'Beautiful Boy' by Ben Harper hits home for me more when it comes to josh, but i think thats just cause it was in the video.

--

did you mean to say Mrs. Hippie aka my madre? anyways, yeah it was a very frat house, you could tell they were getting annoyed with all of jo's girl design suggestions but its so funny because they want all the girl stuff like curtains lol but i recall a sentence of "when you buy a house arent you supposed to take the wallpaper off yourself?" hahaha and jo was talking about getting slipcovers for the couch - but troy wants to get a seahawk slipcover LOL the ladies would be so hott for that.

--
i'm combining my "irresponsible" things with "how im going to break rules" cause its harder to just be irresponsible haha although i have a feeling you wrote your list on things that would piss you off haha

--

1. i'm going to read my howard hughes book at the desk, i dont care if i'm not supposed to and i jump when people walk to the desk because i didnt see them
2. i'm going to never answer my cell phone or respond to voicemails.
3. i'm going to start posting how much i hate work on my facebook, for my boss and all of management/coworkers to see.
4. im not going to recycle this can after its empty
5. i'm not even going to use recycled paper anymore.
6. i'm not going to reduce
7. i'm not going to reuse
8. i'm not going to recycle.
9. im going to spit at people off my balcony
10. i'm going to throw rocks at birds
11. i'm going to use cork as insulation in my house. (okay long inside joke i'll tell you guys about it later haha)
12. im going to stop washing my hands.
13. for a matter of fact i'll probably stop bathing, shaving and washing my hair.
14. i wont answer the phone at work anymore, i'll just let it ring and ring and ring. no matter how bad it echoes.
15. im going to start being an ass to people in wheelchairs, i will tell them to take the stairs and if they say they can't ill say "not my problem"
16. im going to stop opening the door for old people.
17. actually im just going to stop opening the door
18. and when someone opens the door for me, i'm just going to stare at them.
19. im going to be pissed at my mailman when i go to get my mail and it isnt ready yet.
20. im going to start parking wherever i like and put something on my car that makes it impossible to move, even for a tow truck
21. im going to stop going to class
22. im going to stop doing homework
23. and im not even going to make excuses for my teachers, whats a coulpe grand a class? not my problem
24. im going to smoke ciggerettes
25. smoke dope.
26. maybe some heroin too.
27. im going to drink at 8am, and i dont mean beer and wine, the good liqour that gets me wasted for the whole day
28. and when i need to puke from drinking so much im just gonna do it, im not going to throw up in a trashcan or in my purse or even try to hide it.
29. heck i might even try and specifically throw up on someone.
30. im not going to pay my bill at a restaurant
31. and im going to tip crappy
32. heck maybe i wont even tip.

okay this list can honestly go on and on and on awesome blog post jo!

jojo cucina cucina said...

OH gawd, i'm dying laughing. You know how we say ROTLMAO. I am really doing that Miss Kylee!

You know, I think we should try and get this one to 100! Cause i keep thinking of new ways to be irresponsible!

By the way, my designs were NOT girl designs. I was the one who threw away that stupid fake birdcage with the fake flowers in there hanging from the ceiling not to mention the stupid bonnet with fake flowers around the brim.

26. I totally forgot about that i am not going to recycle.

27. Also when i park my car, i am going to take up TWO spaces do i won't get door dings.

28. I am going to send my entree back more often just to show the restaurant whose boss. Even if i like my food too.

29. I am going to quit voting. How could i forget this one. That should have been my number one!

30. I am going to check out books from the library and never return them.

jojo cucina cucina said...

Oh yeah, and when a friend needs someone to help them tear off wallpaper in their home, i am going to tell them to go &$^# themselves.

(disclaimer: It was ALL my idea to tear that wallpaper off, so i have no one but myself to blame.)

Brian said...

I am going to just sit around until 11:40 in the morning doing nothing but watching werewolf movies and typing on a computer....oh I'm already doing that.

I am going to not exercise and blame it on being sick....oh I've already done that.

I am going to procrastinate cleaning the rest of the garage....done!

I could go on and on and feel quite successful.

Modern Hippie said...

haha well no your input on the house made huge differences but its something only a girl would ever do. haha.

haha i re-read mine after you said it made you ROTFLMAO and i started laughing haha i especially liked the "tell people in wheelchairs to take the stairs because its not my problem" haha that would be SO horrible. haha.

yes this one can easily get 100 - i honestly was on a roll i could make a list to 500 easy. i'll just add 5 more.

1. im not going to give people the correct change at work and if they say something i'll tell them they are stupid and dont know how to count
2. im going to refuse to give a refund even when it was our fault. especially if it was MY fault.
3. im going to transfer every call i get to charters since they dont work on sundays and the call will just listen over and over to the recording about holland america cruise lines.
4. im going to give people bad directions on purpose
5. im going to tell someone i will watch their luggage, and then walk off.

haha those were fun. best post ever.

Modern Hippie said...

hahaha brian!! werewolf movies, really? haha you can come up with some better ones, shoot i could come up for some for you. haha

Modern Hippie said...

oh i forgot to explain the cork insulation. this is actually pretty funny. i'm taking a sustainable design class right now, and one of the biggest things for energy saving and efficency is your insulation and one of the other things is that isulation is getting SO good that your house can't even breathe

so we were talking about the ways to provide good insulation and have your house breathe and this annoying kind of stupid girl in my class goes

"well couldnt you use cork? i mean its so spongy and has so many spores it could breathe really easily" we all started laughing, that would be the most exspensive insulation of such a beautiful valuable natural resource ever. i mean seriously? hahaha

equeyaya said...

Music: Darius Rucker's "All I Want"
In my glass: H20
Book: Pat Conroy's Prince of Tides - jojo's recommendation
Last iTunes purchase: David Gray's "Draw the Line"
What i keep forgetting to do: I forget

1. I'm going to stop cleaning my house and cleaning up after people.
2. I'm not going to give my kids money for anything.
3. Voting? No more.
4. Forget recycling. I think it's time littering made a comeback.
5. I'm going to abandon my family and travel the world.
6. No more giving to charity. Let those losers fend for themselves.
7. I'm going to put my cold sweaty glass down on the good furniture with no coaster.
8. I'm going to hover over the potty when I pee and not wipe off the drips.
9. I'll leave my shopping cart in the middle of the parking lot.
10. When my dog poops in the park, I'm not going to pick it up.

Modern Hippie said...

haha equeyaya 7 is classic!! jo would hate that which now inpsires me to do some for jo that she would hate

1. im going to wear high heels on your beautiful wood floors.
2. im going to steal your rubber gloves and never give them back
3. im going to bring oliver over to the house and let him do whatever he wants
4. im going to mop your floors. with pine glo.
5. im going to tell you i will water your plants when you're out of town. and not do it.

amulbunny said...

Music: Gypsy Kings: El Mariachi (Desperado)
Book: The Associate, John Grisham
Last ITune Purchase: Not in a couple weeks, just the free Austin City Limits folder
What I Keep Forgetting to Do: Use my list when I go shopping

1. I don't think they'd notice if I quit cleaning. I refuse to clean up after the kids. They are adults.
2. They can pay for the gas they use.
3. Voting, because this city needs new leadership.
4. I recycle because that big blue can looks lonely sitting by itself.
5. I want a real vacation, spa weekend, someone to pamper me and make me feel like I deserve it.
6. I will continue to use my good pain pills because the pain goes away if I use the good ones.
7. I will not freak out over the little white dog across the street that gets out and pees in my front yard, freaking my dog out, however if I catch him, I am putting him in a cage and letting his asshole owners look for him.
8. I will not be angry when people find out I am a closet Vikings fan after all those years as a Packer fan.
9. I might give everyone that I usually give present to a note that says I contributed a heifer to heifer international in their name.

Modern Hippie said...

amulbunny you're being perfect! you're supposed to list the things you're going to do to break the rules and be irresponsible! haha

of course i dont think any of us are truly serious about their "rule breaking" at least i'm not serious anyways. haha.

louielouie said...

1. I'm not going to post

IslandPearl said...

I'm with louielouie. Bwahahahah

jojo cucina cucina said...

Ms. Hippie stole many of my irresponsibilities that i am planning. But i still have more:

31. You know those little sponge-y things with a handle that you put dishwater soap in? I am NOT going to put the soap in the handle when it's empty anymore.

32. I am also not going to put the toilet paper roll on after using the last sheet. ESPECIALLY when i am at work. (Since i have my own bathroom at home, i would only be hurting myself.)

33. I will ALWAYS eat the last eggroll even if i already had my share. (Because you see, being irresponsible, also means being selfish and impolite.)

34. Here's a good one: I am going to BEND DOWN the pages of every book i ever borrow of someone's. AND i will spill red wine on the cover too and not even apologize.

35. I will say to people, "Let's have lunch" and then i never will.

36. (And if they call ME for lunch, see #6.)

37. I will never return anything i borrow. And i will borrow all kinds of stuff that i don't even need.

It just occurred to me, that this post should be " How to be an Asshole".... if that's true, then why do so many people love the irresponsible people?

By the way, eque. I love all of yours too, but before i even saw Ms. Hippie call out your #7 i was getting ready too.

amulbunny broke the rules! i am thinking if there was a prize, amulbunny wins! LOLOLOL....

and as for you louielouie and islandpearl. You'll be back. It's too much fun not to be.

And i'm being serious here for a minute, but as i thought of this for a blog post i was thinking how much we need it because i think each and every one of us posting here are THE very type of people who DO take maybe too much responsibility at time in their daily personal and professional lives, even when it takes a toll on you all.

It's hard doing trying to do the right thing, especially when it's the hard thing and it can be exhausting and sometimes with very little rewards.

* * * * *

louielouie said...

Work related

1. I will roll my eyes and sigh audibly when someone makes a stupid suggestion in a meeting.

2. I will walk out of meetings when I get bored or irritated, after announcing that I am bored or irritated.

3. I will pick my nose in meetings and wipe it under the table –next to my gum.

4. I will tell people what I really think about their work ethic, or lack thereof

5. I will volunteer to work on the levy but not follow through.

6. When someone asks why they didn't know something I will say " Mr X didn't bother to tell you because he doesn't think you're important enough to know" if it's the truth and even when it isn't.

7. I will never run (or empty) the dishwasher at work or wipe off the counter.

8. I will leave my dirty dishes in the sink with icky stuff stuck in them and noodles and limp lettuce in the drain.

9. I will let the coffee pot run dry and burn on the bottom.

10. I will stop replacing the paper towels and I will never again use the toilet plunger in the work restroom.

I only wish I used feminine hygiene products so I could flush them and clog up the system myself. Maybe I’ll do it anyway.

11. Every now and then I will follow through or do the right thing, just to keep folks off balance and believing that I do mean what I say

~grits~ said...

1. I will let the cat litter box go until they learn to scoop it themselves.

2. I will pile up the clean laundry and let whoever wants theirs get it.

3. I will flip off stupid drivers and pedestrians in the car line at school.

4. I will tell gripey co-workers to STFU already!

5. I will change the answering machine msg to "email or snailmail me - I hate talking on the phone!"

crap - yall took all the good ones already like parking, voting, recycling etc. Mine are just bitching that I wish I had the nerve to do - lol.

sam said...

I'm not going to send Christmas cards out.

If you don't have my new address then you're sol. I might give it to you, jojo, when I send out your notachristmascard.

I'm going to do all the breaking up with friends first. Or maybe I won't even bother and let them wonder what they did.

I'm going to quit cooking dinner for the family. pb&j for the rest of their lives as far as I'm concerned.

I'm spending all the money that comes into this house. And only on bills that HAVE to be paid. The rest is going to be for doodads I don't need or even want.

I'm going to quit doing for others. And I'm not telling them. Example: our church has a huge community Harvest Festival as an alternative to trick-or-treating. As attending members it's expected that we'll help. The Children's Pastor said to me "I see you haven't signed up for a booth this year". My reply? "Yep."

As soon as the hero husband gets back from this next 3 months in Antarctica I'm going to Africa and leaving him with the kids, the dog, the bills, the stuff....

jojo cucina cucina said...

Hey sam, hey louie!

I thought of some more last night when i couldn't sleep:

38. I am never going to RSVP anymore.

39. And sometimes i WILL RSVP but i won't show up.

40. I'm going to leave every light on in every room.

41. I won't worry about bugging other condo folks if i play my music too loud. They should love living next door to someone who likes to party. It means i'm happy!

42. I am not going to tell people that they have spinach in their teeth when they do.

43. And sometimes i am going to tell them that they DO even when they don't.

louielouie said...

I will boldly post on this blog in the middle of a business meeting

I am posting boldly......

equeyaya said...

Lol Louie!!

Grits, love your 5!

Hey, Sam!!

EoDE said...

These are some great lists! Some are cracking me up, they're so funny, and others I can identify with way more than I should. Here are mine:

1. (Work-related) I'm going to use adjectives to modify verbs and I'm going to permanently disable the spell-check function in Word.

2. I’m going to check out books from the library and eat day-old bread while I read them, then return them filled with crumbs.

3. If I get sick, I’m going to cough on everyone I pass and put my sticky, germ-infested hands on everything within reach.

4. At the grocery store I'll hit the dairy and frozen foods sections first, do all my shopping, then change my mind and leave all the refrigerated items in the canned goods and paper product aisles.

5. At the department/discount store I'll leave the dressing room a shambles, even if I’m not trying on clothes.

6. In public restrooms I’ll toss used toilet paper and towels on the floor, and I won’t flush after myself or anyone else. (Ewwww.)

7. At the restaurant I’ll go to the buffet, pile my plate with enough food to feed a family of four, summon the manager and complain about the quality of their offerings, and then ask for a take-home box. When the manager explains that because it’s a buffet I can’t take it with me, I’ll exit in a great huff.

8. In fact, I’ll enter and exit everywhere in a great huff, whether I’m mad or not.

louielouie said...

1. I'm not going to bother to write my own list, just add on to others' ideas...

Jo’s 24. I am going to take more than 5 items in the dressing room. - I already do that, but now I’m going to try on clothes that are too tight so they will tear plus wear a lot of orange-ish foundation that stains all the clothes I try on.

Oh forget about adding on, I'll just steal your good ones, without giving credit where credit is due:

27. im going to drink at 8am, and i dont mean beer and wine, the good liqour that gets me wasted for the whole day 
28. and when i need to puke from drinking so much im just gonna do it, im not going to throw up in a trashcan or in my purse or even try to hide it. 29. heck i might even try and specifically throw up on someone.

4. Forget recycling. I think it's time littering made a comeback.

8. I'm going to hover over the potty when I pee and not wipe off the drips.

27. Also when i park my car, i am going to take up TWO spaces do i won't get door dings.

3. If I get sick, I’m going to cough on everyone I pass and put my sticky, germ-infested hands on everything within reach.


I'm going to quit doing for others. And I'm not telling them.

8. …In fact, I’ll enter and exit everywhere in a great huff, whether I’m mad or not.

huruph

louielouie said...

BTW Grits, why would there BE any clean laundry to pile up?

ps the meeting was really boring

jojo cucina cucina said...

louie's right Grits. Why are you doing the laundry in the first place???? LOL.

Those are some of my favorites you listed, louie. It think eque said "I think it's time littering made a comeback." (I always thought those signs "Litter and it will hurt" were kind of stupid. What kind of message is that anyway?

and EoDE, i wish i came up with this one:
"In fact, I’ll enter and exit everywhere in a great huff, whether I’m mad or not."

Y'all are good at this!

Modern Hippie said...

well the 'litter and it will hurt' signs are so very true. it does hurt. from sustainaiblity to wildlife -- these just needed a better slogan i guess haha

1. im going to restart my list everytime i post because im too lazy to go back and see what number im truly on
2. when i have pink eye im going to touch my eye and then touch everything public; elevator buttons, door handles, everything and anything.
3. I am however going to pick up my dogs poop when i walk him, but im NOT going to dispose of it properly lol
4. im going to let my dog hump any fine young dog thing that walks and let him spread his seed around town since he still has the ability
5. im not going to post in a number that makes sense like 5, or 10. and im also going to make this #5 totally bullshit
6. i am going to throw dirty underwear off my balcony and just buy new ones instead of washing them.

Anonymous said...

1) I'm going to only recycle wine corks, as insulation.
2) I'm going to spank my bratty grandkids when they need it, and my son for being a dork of a dad to them as well.
3) I'm going to tell my daughter in law she is a cold fish, picky eater, and she can bring her own D@mn food to family get togethers.
4) I'm going to spend MY money on MYSELF, not on people who are too lazy or too dumb to get and keep a job.
5) I'm going to not change my oil, wash the car, or rotate the tires.
6) I'm never sending another Christmas, Birthday, or anniversary card of gift, even if you DO send me a thank you.
7) I'm not cooking. Make your own meals, I'm done. Better yet, take me out for dinner - I cooked for the first 35 years, Resturants for the next seem fitting.
8) I'm not keeping track of the family calandar. You want to do it, fine, don't put me in the middle.
9) I'm not babysitting or pet sitting. Enough cleaning up poop and puke.
10) I'm going to be the queen, treat me as such.
11) I'm going to travel everywhere I've wanted to, being the ugly American and swearing alot at the locals.
12) I'm going to stop going to church and tithing, and doing any thing with it.
13) I'm going to tell telemarketers I'd love them to send me stuff and keep calling, but give them my crappy relative's phone and address.
14) I'm going to fold my husbands underwear back up, without washing them, and see how long it takes him to notice.
15) I'm going to send computer viruses to everybody that sends me e-mails with a bunch of forwards and multiple e-mails on it.
16) I'm going to tip one cent, and tell the manager that they were lousy.
17) I'm going to tell people that ask for money to get a job.
18) I'm going to spend the day watching porn.
19) I'm going to call up old lovers and tell them what I thought of them in bed.

jojo cucina cucina said...

OK, who is Anonymous???? LOL. (I like your #19)

hmmmm.....It's getting to be a challenge now and i have started trying to come up with new ideas when i am awake in the middle of the night, so it's probably time to change this blog post.

44. I am going to call up and pledge to buy all kinds of stuff off PBS TV or donate to causes when i get calls and then never send the check.

i don't think i can come up with anymore.

Modern Hippie said...

i think we exhausted all the really good ones. although i think i could still come up with a bunch.

1. im going to shake my rugs off my balcony and not care that goes to people below especially my neighboors
2. im going to knock on my peoples door really hard and loud in the middle of the night and then run off.
3. im going to let oliver run loose in the building, dont care where he shits or pees or who he humps lol
4. im going to chnage the locks on my doors, not pay rent and ignore all evicition notices i will cement the door shut (its steel so they cant shop through it) i will also seal the balcony door shut incase they get desperate
5. im not going to cut soda rings and hope that birds get caught in them
6. im going to stop playing and cuddliing with my oliver even when he begs for it. lol

actually oliver is funny, i have this one chair that jojo got me, its a "dorm room" chair but its SO comfy but its small - it only seats for one, and when im using my laptop i put it on my drafting board so its like a little table, and oliver always insists on jumping up and sitting with me, but there is really no where for him to sit so hes basically on top of the laptop, but he refuses to ever move when he does this lol hes an attention whore.

r4i said...

ohh yes its too hard to be perfect and the fact is that no one can be perfect. The point is that it is not impossible. Perfection is not what you get by birth you have to strive hard to be close to perfection. Being irresponsible is pretty easy I guess lol:)