Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Dear Santa.

Dear Santa:

The few things that I want for Christmas will make the world a better place for me and many others. I can't ask God because my requests are trivial and insignificant and God already His plate pretty full with Middle East chaos, typhoons, tsunamis, and other natural disasters, school shootings, global warming, and all those people who want Him to make sure their football team or American Idol wins.

So Santa it's up to you.

I still believe in you. I know i doubted your existence when you bought me that Frank Sinatra album for my new record player that Christmas in 1966 when i was 9 years old. It gave me pause because it was MY MOM who loved Frank Sinatra, not me! What i wanted was Nancy Sinatra's These Boots Are Made for Walking. But then it occurred to me that maybe you just got your Sinatras mixed up.

So here's what i want Santa.

1. People need to put away their fucking iPhones when interacting with other human beings. Most of my friends are good about  this when i am with them... but not everybody. It especially irritates me in a meeting when the very folks who are constantly checking their phones make the meeting longer by asking questions that were already addressed earlier.

And while I'm on the subject, Do NOT bring me a cell phone for Christmas.  I am perfectly happy without one.

2. Please make people quit telling their super sad stuff on Facebook. Facebook is not the appropriate place to lay out your life's woes. I am wholly inadequate in how to respond when someone posts on Facebook about their loved ones who have died or even worse, those who keep a running weekly report on their dying loved one.

3. Please keep Obama safe and on even keel through his last term. I am asking God for this too, but i am also asking you. (He needs that much help. And like YOU, i still believe in Obama....

4. Stop James Patterson from writing books! And Dean Koontz while you're at it. And also that woman who writes those Fifty Shades of Gray books. They suck because they write for the money only.

5. Can you do something about Microsoft and Bill Gates too while you're at it? Or at the very least can you make it happen that every time i "Send Error Report" they send me $100?

6. I would love it if you can make sure that Darrell doesn't get killed on The Walking Dead. This is actually more important to me than my #4. But not as important as my #3.

7.  Could you make Xanax a vitamin?

And though i have more requests on my lists i have to quit because of my limit of 500 words per blog post...But i do want to add one more:

8. Can you make it happen that the Seahawks win the SuperBowl? (I no longer care about American Idol.)

Love, jo


NOTES TO SELF:
Word Count: 496 (not counting Notes)
Sunrise: 7:52 am
Sunset: 4:21 pm
Temp: 46/37
Book: Military Brats (nonfiction)
Shout Out: Amulbunny
Longest run this week: 45 minutes.
Looking forward to: Snow in the forecast on Friday!


2 comments:

jojo cucina cucina said...

If YOU wrote a letter to Santa, what would you write?

jojo cucina cucina said...

Not sure what i am going to do just yet but i think i am going to change this format in 2014. I am not taking it down. I accept that blogging is dead and will adjust.