Thursday, April 16, 2015

Jo Goes To Yoga (Another True Story)

Even though i can run 4+ miles a few days a week, i am not fit. I
found out how much when i started babysitting Baby Brady and my hip flexors (didn't even know what those were before) kept giving me troubles because of how i carried him. Whenever i did anything that wasn't involving sitting or running, sleeping or eating, my muscles would picket the next day and let me know this wasn't in their job description. (Little union joke.) 

I couldn't get a buddy to commit just yet so i venture out to the YMCA all by myself. I haven't been to the Y for probably 8 months though we've been paying for it. (In other words, we donate to the YMCA and regular attendance was another thing i promised to keep up with in retirement and failed to do.) 

I got my yoga mat, my shoes are off. I am ready for Gentle Yoga. 

Oh good, the instructor is late. Like 10 minutes late. (Is this allowed in yoga?) Everyone is here and ready and get this, I am probably the next the youngest person in the room of 14 people. One woman came in with a walker! 

Finally he arrives in a rush. (Hmm, there is no rushing in yoga,  is there? Also i am the third youngest person in the room now. But that's a good thing in an instructor right?) 
And then he starts us in a stand up pose, eyes closed, arms loose and palms out. I like the nice music. He's talking to us about relaxing and NOT being in a rush, he's talking about breathing. He's talking about waves at the oean. He's talking about breathing. He's telling us to feel our toes and our fingers. He's talking about breathing. Now relax your neck he says and think about the beautiful place we live. And then the breathing again. 

(FOR GOD's sake.... I am breathing! How long are we going to keep doing this? It seems like 5 minutes have gone by already, i sneak a look at the clock, yep it's a quarter to 11:00)

He's back to the seasons, I'm breathing. Inhale and exhale, ( though like like Zumba, i have it backwards every time). Also i noticed every single person has their eyes closed when i peeked at the clock. 

I'm breathing, he's still talking about the season, then he say something like this: "spring will be melting into summer, you know like that song "Turn, Turn Turn" by the Beatles."
WHAT???? By the Beatles? I open my eyes again to see if anyone caught that. Nobody. Then i keep thinking. Who does that song anyway? Why can't i remember? I know for sure it's not the Beatles and i would bet all my Jeopardy money on that, but who is it? The Turtles? No, that doesn't sound right at all. Yes! This is what is going through my head for the rest of the time. It's making me crazy i can't think of the band. 

Finally we are done just the standing and we do some more stuff that involves a chair. If you're good, you don't need the chair. After about a minute in that pose, i got a chair. 

So far, so good though. Wow, these stretches are pretty easy. Gentle Yoga is maybe TOO gentle. I only need to work on the breathing but i'm good at this! We do balance on one leg, one arm extended, pretty good at that too ...especially if i lean my hip against the mirror. (When he comes around I don't do that though. He never saw me.) 

He helps me get my back flat when i have one leg extended balanced on the chair and one arm straight out. But he had to help others too, not just me, the newbie.
It was all pretty gentle actually. Finally we are done. That was a fast hour, well, 50 minutes. Not sure this is going to be enough yoga for me I'm thinking. I'm going to check the schedule for a different yoga class. 

hahahahahahaha...... It's now the next morning as i write this. My shoulders, butt, backs of my legs, even my arms are screaming! They are not only picketing, they already went on strike! 
They lied! (Is lying in yoga allowed?) If this is Gentle Yoga, what is the other yoga going to be like? Thank goodness our instructor was 10 minutes late! 

So I'm going to keep going. Besides those new muscles which have been on permanent L&I for years, i need to work on my breathing and yes, my judgement!
Besides, where else can you go at 58 years old you and be nearly the youngest person in the room? 

Oh yeah, and right as I am pulling out of the parking lot of the Y it came to me: Turn Turn Turn is by The Byrds! I should have known that immediately but it's one of those kinds of things that usually keep me up in the middle of the night. So maybe yoga can help me with my memory too! That would be the best!

Sunday, April 5, 2015

The opposite of Blog Slog... More like Blog Sloth

I need to change this but because of our wood floors being refinished we couldn't put back our area rugs for six weeks (as I was told). And so we couldn't put our nice ergonomic rolling chair in our computer guest bedroom. I hate changing this blog on the iPad.....

 in the words of the Terminator... I'll Be Back.